Why You Can’t Stay Consistent with Your Health Goals
If your health routine feels like a “should,” this simple shift will give you back your energy, motivation, and joy
From Disciplined and Drained to Motivated
At 29 years old, I was fit, strong, and disciplined from going to the gym and eating a clean diet.
Each morning, I kicked myself out of bed to work out, pulled kale and turkey out of the fridge for lunch, and went through my workday and went to professional events to keep my career up to date.
The only problem was… I hated my life. I had the body and habits I wanted, but I didn’t enjoy any of it.
I had been in this situation for years: stuck between what I wanted - a healthy body and successful career - and the things I felt obligated to do to get them. The tension caused me to rebel. I would eat well and exercise intensively for two weeks, fall out of my routine for a week, and pick it up again when I started gaining weight.
Then one day, I stumbled on a book in the local bookstore: “The Values Factor” by John Demartini.
As I flipped through it, a phrase caught my eyes:
“If you genuinely want to achieve a goal and find yourself unable to do so, you have another option: find a way to link your goal to your highest values.”
As I kept reading, Demartini outlined an exercise for determining your values that was unlike any I had ever seen. Rather than offering a checklist with words like “kindness” and “trust,” he offered a set of questions like, “How do you spend your personal money?” and “What items fill your personal and professional space?” The questions together were a way of uncovering where my energy, attention, and interest naturally went.
After spending 15 minutes taking the assessment and studying my common answers, three values jumped out at me: creative self-expression, personal growth, and community.
Already smiling, I took out a piece of paper and wrote down three goals I wanted to link to my highest values: staying fit and healthy, eating nourishing meals, and making professional connections (networking). Then, I let my pen fly as I explored how I could shift my approach to each to link to my highest values.
Here’s what I shifted after that exercise.
I shifted two of my gym days to playing beach volleyball regularly in a community and dancing with friends. I still hit the gym with a new motivation to improve my squats and jumps so I can play better
I take one day per week to explore ways to upgrade my meals and have created new pestos (e.g. mint-arugula), new vinaigrettes, and new recipes to make my healthy meals more creative
I stopped dry networking events and joined the local Toastmasters and a Storytelling community that put me in contact with professionals in my city, while giving me the chance to share what I do on stage
Achieving my goals is something that’s now energizing, sustainable, and fun. The best part is, I realized motivation isn’t something you force - it’s something you design. That’s what I’ll share with you next.
The Values Process
If you want to know your natural sources of energy, motivation, and attention, start by uncovering your values.
This Personal Values Map, inspired by John Demartini, is a fun, easy way to see what values you’re drawn to and living in your life. Once you’ve answered all the questions, count up the repeating answers, even those that are worded differently (e.g. telling stories, writing music, and acting on stage are all forms of storytelling or personal expression) to see what the repeating themes are.
Your top three values will be the answers that repeat the most. If your answers are “watching films” or “playing video games,” those count as well.
Once you have your top three values clear, write down a goal you want more motivation to achieve. If the goal is “going to the gym,” considering reframe it to “Getting strong and fit.” Then, look for new ways you can achieve it that align with your personal values such as:
Joining a Crossfit community
Playing beach volleyball
Capoeira
Inviting a friend and committing to a catch-up right after
Gamifying the experience and linking rewards to milestones
Exploring animal movements and calisthenics at home…
Once you’ve written down 10-20 options, choose one that lights you up to try.
You’ll know you’ve chosen right when you discover that you’re achieving your goals and excited for your routines on a daily basis.
If you get stuck coming up with ways to align your goals with your values, reach out. I’d love to brainstorm with you how to create a successful and energizing life.
